W.O.R.R.I.E.D

I admit, I'm afraid of being alone. I'm afraid being in a place where I don't know no one. I'm afraid of being left by friends who venture to other oppurtunities. I'm afraid of going to places where I don't know what will going to happen.

People might think I have this strong personality, but deep down I still cry like a baby. It's a shameful thing to say but that's the truth.

I am afraid of change. I always was. Although human nature, one can easily adapt to anything.

Why do I have these thoughts?

I'm off to Kuwait alone for a work-related trip. I'm scared - worried i guess is the perfect word to describe my feelings right now. I'm worried that I may not live up the expectations my company is entrusting me. I'm worried specially because of the thought that our client might not be satisfied with my work while I'm there.

Surely, I matured a lot. Gained a lot of knowledge, but I always believe that there are still a huge room for improvement. Am I ready for this? I'm not sure. This is a huge responsibility that's why I'm worried sick. I'll be facing our clients with a huge name of my company written on my face.

The other reason maybe is the hearsay that our client is very hard to please. It is my first time working with an Arab descent. Ever since I travel abroad, I always deal with people with chinese descent and I always get along with them.

Change. I've written about change ages ago. But I think, that fear still with me. My friend who've been my officemate since the day I started to work and whom I followed when she transfered to another company is about to leave our company. Talking with her it seem the oppurtunity and benefits is hard to top. It's a good deal. As a friend and a god-father to her daughter, I always hope the best for her. If it's time to leave then I guess, there is nothing left to do than to support her decision. It would be hard parting to people who are dear to you and who've been there in your ups and down. It's for her family, better salary and that means better life ahead of them.

I'm still worried. I guess that is one of my personality. I always worry a lot. About all the things, the future and all.

I know I feel stupid worring things which did not happen yet. It's a stupid stupid thing to do. I guess I have to learn to overcome these things. It's for my own good.