Perfect World

Things's changing, evolving - a fact we have no control of.

Im a guy of 25 years - I have a quite normal life. I have a loving parents and siblings, I have a job that well, pays somewhat enough (for the time being) to materialize my materialistic urges, I have caring and kind friends, traveled different cities in Asia - I mean, I am living the way I wanted, I have a full control of what I do and to what I think.

Then when you think that you have the perfect life, you realize its not. For few years, I never thought that many things won't happen to my life. I was contented living on my own perfect world. But things have change. My "perfect" life is vanishing bit by bit. The life I immortalized in my mind has changed into reality - that life's full of love and hate, war and peace, that you will not get all the things you've dreamed of, that things doesn't always fall into place the way we perceived it, and that people come and go - a realization that you are still in fact in this earth.

Just this year alone, I lost two people whom I cared about - my aunt and a friend of mine, two of my friends got married, another friend will tie the knot comes January. A friend of mine finally have a baby and was christened a few weeks back, other friends are now living a life and I got a new neice through my cousin. Then it hit me. How about me?

Since I've created a world of my own, I think I'm stuck in my own. I can't move on. I am trying but I am having a hard time adjusting to it - because I never thought things like these would never come in my life.

I have this feeling maybe because I felt I was left out. It seems people I know are living life the way life should be. And because of that, I know they are happy. And I am not? Maybe yes maybe not because I feel that there is something missing.. I am confuse with all the things that struck my life in my own perfect world - my unreal world which I think will collapse eventually.